How to Write a Love Letter to Your Spouse

Keep your love letters real

Love Letters
Photo: David Buffington/Photodisc/Getty Images

Whether or not writing love letters was part of your courtship days together, consider writing love letters to your spouse now. Don't let love letters become a lost art in your marriage. Here are a few tips to help get you started and to help keep your love letters REAL.

  • Make time to write a love letter when you feel close to your spouse and when you are not rushed.
  • Don't set up a calendar/email reminder to nag yourself into writing a love letter. Receiving a love letter on the 16th of each month is not romantic. No one wants to feel like they've just been checked off a to-do list.
  • Keep and use nice stationery and a nice writing pen for when you write your love letters.
  • Read a few of Keats's words. They may inspire your own creative juices as you write a love letter to your spouse.
  • Don't try to be poetic or flowery or lovey-dovey or mushy if that is not who you are. If "Hi Sweetie" is the way you talk, then that will have more meaning than "My darling dearest" and will be more real to your spouse.
  • Please don't copy a love letter you find in a book or online. Don't use a template or formula each time you write a love letter. Write what is in your heart.
  • Express your appreciation for who your spouse is.
  • Be sincere as you compliment your spouse. Don't manipulate. Your spouse will see through manipulation.
  • Describe your feelings as you write your thoughts.
  • Some ideas to write about: share how your spouse has touched your heart, share a favorite memory about your spouse, talk about a song that reminds you of your spouse. But don't do all three in the same love letter. Keep your love letter focused, simple, and honest.
  • Try not to ramble.
  • It's okay to mention passion and desire and wanting to make love and being attracted to your spouse in your love letter, but don't use a love letter as a way to put guilt on your spouse if your sex life isn't what you want it to be.
  • Make sure that you don't use a love letter as a confessional. That's not why you are writing a love letter to your spouse.
  • Don't worry about making your love letter perfect. It doesn't have to be exquisite to affirm your love for your spouse.
  • Send some of your letters to your spouse through the mail.
  • Write some short love notes and hide the notes around your home. These notes can be on scraps of paper or sticky notes!