Guys, Listen Up: What Girls Really Want

Do's and Don'ts: Basically, Just Be Yourself

If you're a teenage boy, you might spend some serious time wondering just what it is that girls want in a boyfriend and a relationship, what's really important to them and what turns them off. If you're one of those guys, check out this list to find out what a girl really wants from you. 

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Don't Worry About Shyness

Mixed race couple taking self-portrait with cell phone

Girls get a little worried if you freeze up in a conversation, but otherwise, it's OK to be shy. It makes it even more impressive if you make the first approach. Take a chance; don't hold back. It's better than spending your entire life wondering "what if ...?"

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Don't Stress Over Acne

Teenage boy (13-15) applying cream to acne, close-up

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Acne isn't rare in teens. Most girls will see past it, so don't stress. It's likely that the majority of people around you also have acne, including girls. One day you'll get over the acne stage, but for now, just know it's not a factor that girls care too much about.

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Practice Good Hygiene

France, young boy in the bathroom using spray.


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It's OK to let yourself go sometimes, like on the weekends or when you're out getting sweaty. But a guy who showers daily, shaves regularly, brushes his hair and teeth, and has nice nails is appealing. But don't ever wear nail polish. Not to be sexist, but it's unappealing to most girls because it's feminine. Also, some girls really get turned off off by boys who bite their nails. (Though they do it sometimes, too.)

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Be Yourself

Teenage boy and girl taking a picture at prom
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When it comes to flirting and dating, have fun and be yourself. That way, if you don't get the girl in the end, you'll still have your friends, some great memories, and your whole life ahead of you.

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Don't Obsess Over Masculine Image

Young athlete lifting barbell in gym



You know the type: guys with big muscles, a six-pack, and tanned skin. Some girls like that, but others like a guy who's more natural looking. If you like to work out and take care of yourself, then by all means, go for it, that's great. But don't go overboard because at the end of the day, you still have to be cuddly.   

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Don't Use a Girl

Teenage couple kissing in tall grass

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Don't even think about asking a girl out if you're going to use her and then dump her. Many girls don't want to have sex until they're or have met the right person. Don't ever force a girl to do anything and don't try to get a girlfriend just to get lucky. If that's the case, give up now. A girl is looking for someone to love, to date long-term, and to adore for the way he makes her feel.

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Don't Overdo Teasing

School girls blowing kisses to school boy


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Many girls literally hate being teased and get the completely wrong idea from it. It makes them feel self-conscious, and often, if a guy who teases a girl ends up asking her out, she'll have her doubts and be put off. Treat her well; compliment her and strike up conversations. Don't sit ​online waiting for her to make the first move. Girls love a man who starts things in motion.

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Don't Bank on the 'Bad Boy' Thing

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The "bad boy" persona isn't appealing to all girls. If you try to be "bad" for a girl and things with you two don't work out, your reputation is ruined. And if you're not really a bad boy, you're being fake. You're better off just being yourself.

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Have a Sense of Humor

Teenage friends hanging out on outdoor basketball court

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It's said that laughing with your partner makes a bond and solidifies a relationship. So go ahead and use every bit of that sense of humor that you can summon up. She'll love you for it. 

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Have a Heart

Mother and son embracing while sitting in garden

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Girls are knocked out by a guy who shows he has a heart, whether it's helping out strangers, being great to his family, or supportive and caring for her. Show it off.

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Make Her Feel Special

Holding hands


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If she's special to you, let her know it. Surprising her with flowers is a tried-and-true method, but if that's not your style, choose another way to send that message. Tell her how much she means to you, stay in contact with her daily, share your feelings with her, be her best friend.

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Be Confident in Who You Are

Portrait of smiling young man outdoors

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Girls don't expect you to change. They love you whether you're large, skinny, tall, short ... whatever. The little things you do can be more than enough to get a girl hooked: open a door, pick up something she's dropped, say hi, help her when she's struggling in class ... whatever it is, she will appreciate it. Whenever a guy does something to or for a girl—good or bad—she'll think about it for the next few minutes or right up until she goes to bed at night.