Best Places to Meet Lesbian and Bisexual Women

When you're coming out of the closet, it can be hard to know where to meet other lesbians or bisexual women. If you're not sure where to begin, start with this list of the places where you're most likely to run into other lesbians and bisexual women. 

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The Lesbian Bar

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In many cities and small towns, the only place to meet other lesbians may be in the lesbian bar. If you are not into the “club scene” try going on a night other than Friday or Saturday. You may find an open mic or karaoke night. On “off” nights you’re more likely to find an atmosphere that's more low-key and friendly than the party weekend scene.

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Gay and Lesbian Center

If there’s a gay and lesbian center in your town, it can be an excellent place to meet people. Many gay and lesbian centers have support groups, rap groups, book and movie groups and political action activities. Find one that feels right to you and you’re sure to meet other like-minded lesbians and bisexuals.

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Sports Teams

Many cities have recreational sports teams, whether it be softball, volleyball or basketball. It's no secret that lesbians love sports. Some have whole leagues for gay and lesbian athletes, other have teams that are "known" to be the teams lesbians play on. You don't have to be an athlete to get in on the action. Sports like softball and rugby often have many lesbians in the stands watching. It can be a great place to people watch and start a conversation with a stranger.

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The best place to meet other lesbians with interests similar to your own is to get involved in activities that interest you. Volunteer at the local animal shelter. Join the local gardening club or bird watchers group. The lesbians who are there may be few, but you know you’ll have something in common with them.

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Through Friends

Let friends and coworkers know that you want to meet other lesbians and bisexuals. Have them invite you over for dinner or game night. Let them know you're just looking to make friends. Once you meet one or two lesbians that you get along with, you may end up meeting their friends and be welcomed into a whole new circle of people.

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The Internet

Sure most people think of the Internet as a place to meet lesbians to date, but it can also be a great place to meet women for friendship. You can put an ad up that says you’re just looking to make friends and answer other women’s ads that say the same thing. Who knows, you may even hit it off with someone and take it further than just friends.

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If your area has a church that is an "open and welcoming" congregation, that means the church is welcoming to gays and lesbians. Also Metropolitan Community Churches, United Church of Christ and Unitarian Churches, among others are known to be welcoming of gays and lesbians.

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Gay Neighborhoods

Almost every major city has a neighborhood where gays and lesbians tend to live. There’s sure to be a coffeehouse or café where the lesbians will congregate.

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Straight Clubs

When I was in my 20s, there was this hot female rock singer that we used to love. We didn’t know it for sure, but we suspected she was a lesbian. We would go to her shows and sure enough, every time we did, there were plenty of other lesbians there. Keep your eyes peeled for shows and concerts that lesbians are likely to attend.

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Gay Newspaper

Pick up a copy of your local gay paper. There may be personals ads, a calendar of events or announcements for dances, plays, art shows, concerts and other activities. Check out one that interests you. Invite a gay-friendly straight friend to come along if you’re too shy to go by yourself.