The Best Movie Quotes From 'The Hangover'

Scene from The Hangover movie
© Warner Bros Pictures

It's not exaggerating to say Warner Bros Pictures' "The Hangover" was one of the biggest box office surprises of 2009. The R-rated comedy took multiplexes by storm and before it left theaters, "The Hangover" broke the record for the biggest box office take of any R-rated comedy, grossing $277 million in the U.S. and $467 million worldwide.
Starring Ed Helms, Bradley Cooper, Zach Galifianakis, and Justin Bartha, The Hangover is a road trip/buddy comedy set in Vegas in which everything that could go wrong goes wrong during a bachelor party for Bartha's character. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas...right? Not when they need to be back in California for the wedding in a matter of hours and the groom is nowhere to be found. If only the remaining trio could piece together what had happened the night before and find the groom!

Favorite Lines From "The Hangover"

"The Hangover" instantly became a popular movie to quote. Here are some of the most quotable and favorite lines:

Alan (Zach Galifianakis): "Whatever happens tonight, I won't ever speak a word of it. Seriously. I don't care what happens. I don't care if we kill someone. You heard me, it's Sin City."

Sid (Jeffrey Tambor): "Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except for Herpes. That sh-t'll come back with you."

Alan: "That's right. You better walk on. I'll hit an old man in public."

Doug (Justin Bartha): "Tracy did mention we shouldn't let him gamble. Or drink too much."
Phil (Bradley Cooper): "Jesus, he's like a gremlin. Comes with instructions and sh-t."

Alan: Can I ask you another question?
Hotel Receptionist: Sure.
Alan: You probably get this a lot. This isn't the real Caesar's Palace, is it?
Hotel Receptionist:  What do you mean?
Alan: Did, umm... did Caesar live here?
Hotel Receptionist: No.
Alan: I didn't think so.

Alan: "It's not illegal, it's frowned upon, like masturbating on an airplane." (commenting on the legalities of counting cards)
Phil: I'm pretty sure that's illegal too.
Alan: Yeah, maybe after 9/11, where everybody got so sensitive. Thanks a lot, bin Laden.

Alan: "Well maybe we should tell that to Rain Man…because he practically bankrupted a casino, and he was a retard."

Alan: "Hey, guys. You ready to let the dogs out?"

Alan: "I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack."

Alan: (Responding to finding a baby in the closet) "Check its collar or something."

Stu (Ed Helms): "I look like a nerdy hillbilly."

Alan: "Tigers love pepper...they hate cinnamon."

Dr. Valsh (Matt Walsh): (Phil asks the doctor if he knows how to get to the chapel) "I do. It's at the corner of get a map and f--k off. I'm a doctor, not a tour guide."

Alan: (Talking about burning the cop car) "Easy. You just pour kerosene over a ferret, light it on both ends, put it in."

Stu: "We're in a stolen cop car with what is sure to be a missing child in the back. What part of this is cool?"
Alan: "I think the cop car part's pretty cool."
Phil: "Thank you, Alan!"

Alan: "It would be so cool if I could breast-feed."

Stu: She's got my grandmother's Holocaust ring!
Alan: "I didn't know they gave out rings at the Holocaust."

Stu: "You f--king calm down. He drugged us. I lost a tooth. I married a whore."

Stu: "You are literally too stupid to insult." (to Alan)

Black Doug (Mike Epps): "I always wondered why they were called roofies. Cause you're more likely to end up on the floor than the roof. They should call 'em floories."

Alan: "Oh, you know what? Next week's no good...the Jonas Brothers are in town. But any week after that, it's totally fine."

Edited by Christopher McKittrick