8 Obscure Simpsons Quotes I Use Every Day

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8 Ways The Simpsons Improve My Vocabulary

The Simpsons
The Simpsons. TCFFC

I love to quote The Simpsons, but I’m not one to use the usual “D’oh,” “Woo-hoo” or “Don’t have a cow, man.” I go for deep cuts and dare you to even recognize the quote I’m saying. But now I’m going to help you by explaining the origin of the eight Simpsons quotes I always say.

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The running time is now! - "'Cue Detective"

The Simpsons - "Cue Detective"
"The running time is now!" - Nelson. Fox, Screen Cap Via FXNOW

This is a new one but it’s so good, it instantly entered my vocabulary. The elementary school is watching the 1967 Doctor Dolittle as an assembly to keep them busy. When Milhouse discovers the running time is 153 minutes, Nelson screams, “The running time is now!” and tries to escape. Groundskeeper Willie sprays him with a firehose to get him back to his seat, but that should be everybody’s reaction to a movie’s length. Now whenever my friends and I go to the movies and someone asks what the running time is, I say, “The running time is now!” 

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Here comes Two!

A Simpsons Countdown
Here comes two!. Fox, Screen Cap Via Frinkiac

This only works in a situation where you’re watching a countdown of some kind. On The Simpsons it’s whenever they’re about to watch an old timey film that begins with a countdown. By the time it gets to three, someone yells, “Here comes two!” Trust me, NO ONE gets it when I say, “Here comes two” but it’s fun. It’s hard to time it right too because by the time you finish talking, two has passed too. 

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Aye yay yay - Bumblebee Man

Bumblebee Man's Show
"Ay yay yay, la policia!". Fox, Screen Cap Via Frinkiac

Springfield’s local Latino celebrity Bumblebee Man is based on the real Mexican television personality El Chapulin Colorado, The Red Grasshopper. Bumblebee’s comedy is pure slapstick, something goes wrong and he runs around screaming, “Ay yay yay!” I speak a little Spanish myself, so if I know how to say what went wrong in Spanish, I could add it. For example, “Aye yay yay, la salsa esta muy caliente!” 

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Man, oh man - Homer

Homer Simpson
Man, oh man, what a great picture. TCFFC

I thought Homer said this a lot more but it was harder for me to find examples, like Homer’s entrance to Swapper Jack’s. Somehow it still really stuck with me and I like to insert a good “man, oh man” into any longwinded explanation to make it flow a little better! I’ve even worked it into movie reviews I’ve written as a film critic. (I actually remembered this from a different episode. I thought it was part of Homer’s explanation of what a Muppet is from “A Fish Called Selma,” but he only says “man.” So you see, I liked it so much, I even added an “oh man” to another Homer quote!)  

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But here we are - "The Cartridge Family"

The Catridge Family
Homer Simpson buys a gun. Fox, Screen Cap Via Simpsons Wikia

This was barely a joke in the episode. It was really a statement of the plot. Homer ends up buying a gun because he can’t afford an alarm system, but when the alarm salesman tells him he can’t put a price on his family’s safety, Homer responds, “I wouldn’t have thought so either, but here we are.” It’s true and relevant for any time you find yourself in an unexpected situation due to complicated circumstances. It can be a positive too. Example: If you had told me in the ‘80s I’d be more excited for the new Nicolas Cage movie than the new Schwarzenegger movie, I wouldn’t have believed you, but here we are.

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And we never did - "Lisa's Sax"

Homer Simpson - And We Never Did
Let's never drink again... Fox, Screen Cap Via Frinkiac

This is truly hilarious and classic Homer. While telling the story of the first time he and Barney drank, young Barney in the flashback moans, “Let’s never drink again.” Back in the present, Homer says, “And we never did...” while holding an open beer can from which he proceeds to drink. It happens to the best of us. We swear something off but we do it again anyway. When that happens, it always makes me feel better to say, “And we never did.” At least I mean it as much as Homer did.  

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Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? - Any Surprised Simpsons Character

Moe often says "Whaaaaaa?". Fox, Screen Cap Via Audioasylum.com

I bet a lot of people don’t realize this is from The Simpsons, and The Simpsons certainly didn’t invent it. It’s a sort of old school Vaudevillian comedy response to something absurd or shocking, although a Nigerian prince in “The Princess Guide” called it “the ancient tribal sound of confusion.” The Simpsons do it all the time, though, with a character droning on a “whaaaaaaaa?” without even concluding with a T. If you haven’t incorporated this into your daily language yet, I highly recommend you do. There’s no better way to show exasperation with something than to leave the word dangling without a T. It’s best used to sarcastically remind someone that they should have known better. You mean you ate a lot of sweets and now you feel sick? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?

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Everything's coming up Fred Topel - Milhouse

Everything's coming up Milhouse. TCFFC

Poor Milhouse. Nothing ever goes his way, so you can’t really blame him for getting excited when it does. He says, “Everything’s coming up Milhouse.” Fortunately, I have much better luck than Milhouse so I say it a lot more often. I could just use my last name. It has he same amount of syllables to say, “Everything’s coming up Topel.” For some reason, it just feels better to use my whole name. “Everything’s coming up Fred Topel.” And everything always comes up Fred Topel! (Can be abbreviated: ECUFT)