How to Play Hard to Get

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Think playing hard to get doesn't work? Think again! If done in the right way and with the right intentions, playing hard to get can help you capture the attention, affection, and heart of the person in whom you're interested. However, since you don't want to play too hard to get and send the wrong kinds of signals that you're uninterested or not worth pursuing, it's important to keep these five tips in mind when playing hard to get—so you can get together in the end.


1. Have Confidence in Yourself

One of the most important ways to play hard to get is actually to understand from the get-go how awesome you are and how the guy or girl you're interested in would be lucky to have you. Think about it—you are hard to get! And when you're able to recognize this fact about yourself and act in a confident and self-assured way, those around you will see even more clearly how desirable you are. But if you behave in a needy, self-doubting, and insecure way, the person you're interested in won't feel as compelled to want to be with you since you don't think that highly of yourself to begin with and you aren't able to see your true worth.

2. Don't Make Yourself So Available

Another key aspect of playing hard to get has to do with your accessibility. While you may be really interested in someone and want to spend as much time with him or her as possible, it's important that you keep yourself busy, have your own interests, and let this person see that you have an exciting, fulfilling, and engaging life without him or her.

Your instinct may be to cancel on your friends or change whatever you're doing at the drop of a hat in order to hang out with the guy or girl you like. But in reality, having your own passions and not being totally available makes you even more desirable and appealing. And there's no need to rush to answer his or her texts immediately, since you're busy living your life and have other important things to do.


3. Be Outgoing

Another component of playing hard to get is to act in a positive, bubbly, and outgoing way toward everyone around you. You want your crush to see that you not only give your attention and focus to him or her, but to others as well. This kind of behavior can help to make your crush want you even more because he or she will hope to be the one who captures your full and undivided attention. And while you shouldn't be so talkative that you come off as annoying, overbearing, or rude, your goal is to let your crush see that others enjoy being around you and seek out your company. 

4. Set Boundaries

When it comes to playing hard to get, another key step is to adhere to the boundaries you set for yourself. For instance, if you don't typically kiss someone on the first date, then you should stick to this policy no matter how much you like the person you're with and want him or her to like you. And when you stay true to who you are and don't bend the rules or go against your morals or values, you'll be even more alluring to the guy or girl you're interested in because it shows what a strong person you are. Your crush will be more inclined to pursue you when he or she recognizes that not just anybody gets to kiss you.


5. Create a Sense of Mystery

If you're looking to play hard to get, it's also important to establish a sense of mystery, excitement, and intrigue around you and the happenings in your life. For example, if your crush asks you what you did over the weekend, responding in a vague way can help you establish some intrigue and allure. Rather than giving your crush an itemized list of exactly what you were up to over the weekend, who you saw, and where you went, being a bit more general will leave him or her wondering about you and your life and how to be part of it.