How Gay Teens Can Share Their Feelings With a Crush

Saying "I Like You" Can Be Scary, Hard and Rewarding

Two girls making heart shape with their armas and hands in sunset, summer.
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Have you ever had a crush? A lot of GLBT teens have. Sometimes teens just crush away in private and don't share their feelings with another living soul.

Other times they realize that they really want to be able to tell their crush how they feel.

GLBT Teen Experiences Telling a Crush Their Feelings

Everyone is going to feel differently after telling a crush how they feel.

One teen realizes that not having a crush returned doesn't mean her feelings will go away.

She writes

"When I was 13 I had my first girl crush on my friend [K] who is bi. I told her I liked her. She said she would give me a chance but I knew she didn't really have feelings for me, but I still liked her regardless."

Another teen realizes that despite the fact that his friend isn't interested when he shares his crush, his reaction intensifies his feelings. He says:

"My old crush was gorgeously hot. And he was my best friend. Of course he was straight, but when I told him I liked him he was cool with it, which made me like him even more!!!! I also hated it because he was a tease; he always sorta flirted with me and stuff, which I hated, but liked so much.

A third teen is elated simply by getting to share his feelings with the boy he likes.

"I told him!! I swear it was, well, exciting!! You can't imagine how I felt sitting next to him and expecting nothing than the worst! Half an hour later I was like “You remember the crush I told you about? Well…… I was talking about you.” I can’t describe you what happened!! He looked amused. Not disgusted or shocked as I expected but amused. He took it really lightly. So lightly I told him “Hey, I just told I LOVE you. I’m serious.” He still looked amused and then he told me that such things are completely normal. Anyway, then I told him at first I thought I loved him so I thought I was gay then I realized I still love girls and therefore was bi and all that I had a little fight between bi and gay and all that.. he really burst out laughing!! But I mean the good, sweet and lovable laugh. He wasn’t making fun of me or anything. He just sounded happy."

Risks and Benefits to Telling Your Crush How You Feel

We all know that one of the main the benefits of telling a crush you are crazy about him is that he will feel the same and the next thing you know you will have an awesome new boyfriend. But even if your crush doesn't feel the same, expressing your feelings might just feel good and can be like a weight off your chest.

Of course, there are also some pretty serious risks to sharing such personal feelings. One is that it could out you as gay, lesbian or bisexual. Another is that your crush could react negatively and say or do some hurtful things. Additionally, after you share your feelings you might feel shy or embarrassed or too exposed.

How to Tell a Crush You Like Her

Once you have made the decision, you still need to find a way to make your feelings clear. Here are some options:

  • Just come out and say it. "Sally, I like you."
  • Get a friend to tell your crush. Wait for a report.
  • Send a text or PM or go old fashioned and write a real letter.

Whatever your method, remember to be clear. Nothing is more confusing than thinking that someone is saying they like you like that, but not being sure!