How to Get Closure After a Relationship Has Ended

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After a relationship has ended, you may be searching to find closure and move on with the rest of your life. But when it comes to getting that closure you so desire, there’s actually not a one-size-fits-all approach. With this in mind, it’s important that you carefully consider the different ways to get closure after the ending of a relationship and choose the option that works best for you. After all, getting closure after a relationship is a vital step in the process of proceeding with the rest of your life, so it’s important that you take note of these five different approaches so you can finally put an end to this chapter and move on without looking back.

1. Cut off all contact with your ex. ​

If you’re looking for closure after your relationship has ended, one useful strategy is to end all contact with this person. After all, how you can you officially move on if you’re still texting with him or her, calling him or her or even seeing him or her from time to time? By still being in contact with your ex, you’re making it hard to get to a future without him or her because you’re still tied to the past. With this in mind, it’s also important to cut off all social media contact with him or her as well. And this means you should either unfriend or unfollow your ex so that you’re not constantly bombarded with messages and images that keep this person front and center on your screen—and in your life.

2. Allow yourself to be sad. ​

When you’re seeking closure after the ending of a relationship, it’s imperative that you let yourself experience the vast array of different emotions that may be bottled-up inside of you.

And while you may think it’s better to simply brush off any sadness, anger, regret or disappointment, you’re actually preventing yourself from getting closure by not experiencing and fully dealing with these emotions. So no matter how uncomfortable it may be for you, it’s important that you allow yourself to experience these feelings and fully process what happened.

That way, you can move on without these lingering and unmanaged emotions and close the door on this part of your life.

3. Forgive your ex. ​

While it may be challenging to forgive someone who wronged you, another way to find closure is to forgive this person. After all, when you’re still carrying around the hurt, pain and distress from what transpired between the two of you, it’s nearly impossible to find closure because you’re carrying this heavy burden with you each day. However, when you choose to forgive this person, you’re actually not forgiving for his or her sake, but for your own sake. And in order for you to find closure and live your best life, forgiving your ex and letting go of the animosity that you feel can be a way to free yourself from the past and remove the weight that his or her behavior has placed upon you.

4. Write down everything you’d like to say to your ex. ​

Another strategy to find closure after a relationship has ended is to write down the things that you wish you could say to this person. In fact, this is an opportunity for you to clearly express exactly how you feel about what happened between the two of you, and this type of catharsis can be a helpful way to finally get off of your chest what you’ve been holding inside of you.

In fact, simply taking the time to write down everything that you’ve been experiencing can be a way to find closure in-and-of-itself and can enable you to turn the page on this former relationship. 

5. Apologize to your ex. ​

If you feel as though your words or actions may have led to your relationship’s demise, another way to find closure is to apologize to your ex. To that end, if you’re living each day knowing that you wronged this person, it may be hard for you to find closure because you know that you were responsible for hurting someone else. With this in mind, apologizing to him or her can be a great way for you to make right to the best of your ability what happened between the two of you and help you find the closure you’ve been seeking. In fact, your apology may also truly help him or her to find closure as well.