Funny Quotes About Toyota and the Prius

Several Toyota Prius cars on a road

Tomohiro Ohsumi / Getty Images

Ever since the first Toyota dealership opened on October 31, 1957, in Hollywood, California, Americans have had plenty to say about the Toyota Company and Japanese cars on American roads. In 2001, when the Prius became the first mass-produced hybrid vehicle that the U.S. auto industry offered, Americans again had plenty to say about it.

Decades later, the most quotable quotes about Toyota, the Prius brand, and car dealership sales in general are funny quotations from entertainers, auto experts, economists, and other famous people. From both the hybrid advocate and contrarian objector positions come fun quotations about Toyota, Prius, and the U.S. retail car dealership buying experience.

The car quotes that follow are equally shareable with Prius lovers and Prius haters, equally enjoyed by car enthusiasts and auto industry opponents, and equally understood by car buyers and car sellers who have ever set foot on a retail car dealership showroom floor.

On Toyota

"Indeed, if communist central planners could have organized the economy with as much detail, precision, and flexibility as a modern-day Toyota or Wal-Mart, communism would probably still exist." —Jim Stanford, Canadian Economist
“It is a fledgling market, particularly for us, and we need to establish our reputation as a leader in this technology in order to achieve our longer-term goals. Why should Toyota [the hybrid market leader] get to have all the fun?” —Jim Cain, GM Financial Communications
"Toyota's slogan is 'Moving Forward'—they don't say anything in there about stopping." —Stephen Colbert
"Toyota says they’re standing beside their vehicles—because that’s the only safe place to stand." —Author Unknown
"I love driving. I still drive a 1993 Toyota Camry. I do want to get an electric car, but it's less of a carbon footprint if you keep your old, fuel-efficient car on the road than if you say 'build me a whole new car.'" —Josh Fox

On the Prius

“I think we're going to be seeing more hybrid cars. The Prius is known as a hybrid because it can run on either electricity or the smugness of the owner.” —Craig Ferguson
"So my Toyota Prius is an automotive two-fer: a pleasure to drive and patriotic to boot." —Arianna Huffington, founder of the Huffington Post
"In the 'You asked for it, You got it.' category...More bad news for Toyota- a reported problem with the brakes on their Prius Hybrid. The good news—the Prius doesn't go fast enough for the brakes to be a major issue." —Author Unknown
"Toyota is recalling over 500,000 cars due to faulty parts that could cause drivers to lose control of the steering wheel. Among the recalled cars is Toyota's super-efficient hybrid, the Prius. That's how environmentally friendly the Prius is: It actually tries to run you off the road so you'll take public transportation." —Author Unknown
"The Prius has been added to the list of Toyota vehicles with faulty gas pedals that make the car speed out of control. The upside is you can’t even hear the Prius crash." —Author Unknown
"As you know, the Toyota Prius is a hybrid—half gas engine, half runaway racehorse." —Jay Leno
"I saw a guy in a Prius run out of gas...instead of giving him a ride...I sent him positive energy and world peace cause that means more to him." —Author Unknown
"I drive a Toyota Prius. I named mine Judas. Judas Prius." —Neil Patrick Harris
"You don't have to put a Bernie Sanders bumper sticker on your Prius. We get it." —Author Unknown
"My goal this year is to buy a Prius so I can be the anti-Prius driver. Be like, 'Yeah, that's my Prius, the one with the gun rack and the McCain sticker on the back and the dead deer carcass roped to the hood.' Wouldn't that be sweet? Driving around in a Prius, throwing garbage out your window? 'It's a Prius; I already helped the Earth, hippie!'" —Mo Mandel, American Comedian
"I want to wake up and read that  General Motors has decided it will no longer make gas-guzzling Hummers and President Bush has decided to replace his limousine with an armor-plated Toyota Prius." —Thomas Friedman, Pulitzer Prize-winning author
"I absolutely love our Prius. In addition to being obviously economical and environmentally friendly, they drive great and are just plain sexy. There's no reason all Americans shouldn't be driving hybrid cars." —Will Ferrell
"It's a very magical vehicle, that Prius. It runs on half gas, half rainbows or something? When a Prius crashes into another Prius, a Panda has a miscarriage." —Kevin Camia, American Comedian

On Buying and Owning Cars

"In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks." —Scott Adams
"When my car runs out of gas, I buy a new one. I don't want to ride around in a quitter." —Stephen Colbert
"Buying a car used to be an experience so soul-scorching, so confidence-splattering, so existentially rattling that an entire car company was based on the promise that you wouldn't have to come in contact with it." —Susan Orlean
"I had the notion that, OK, so now we have all of this wealth, we could buy not only one expensive car, we could buy all of them. As soon as you realize that you could buy all of them, then none of them are particularly interesting or satisfying." —Pierre Omidyar, Founder of eBay