Humor Web Humor Funny Inspirational Quotes From Famous People Words to Live by From Famous Funny Folks Share PINTEREST Email Print Via Getty Images/Paul Natkin / Contributor Humor Memes Funny Videos Holiday Humor By Beverly Jenkins Beverly Jenkins is a humor and pop culture writer. She has published three web humor books and six calendars, including You Had One Job! and Photobombed. our editorial process Beverly Jenkins Updated February 23, 2019 If you're looking for inspiration, look no further. The quotations below hit all the marks: they're both funny and inspirational, making us laugh while simultaneously providing insight into the human condition. Dalai Lama "If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito." Reba McEntire "To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone." A.A. Milne "People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day." Charles Gordy "A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks." Benjamin Franklin "Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy." Thomas Edison "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." Steven Wright "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" Elbert Hubbard "Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive." Will Rogers "Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there." Robert Frost "By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day." Ellen DeGeneres "Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path then by all means you should follow that." Margaret Mead "Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else." Jack London "You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club." Miles Kington "Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad." Zig Ziglar "People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing—that’s why we recommend it daily." Jim Carrey "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." George Burns "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." Lily Tomlin “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” Ellis Vidler “Bad decisions make good stories.” Ayn Rand “The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me.” Michael Scott “I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms.” Will Rogers “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” Franklin P. Jones “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” Charlie Brooker "New Year's resolutions work like this: you think of something you enjoy doing and then resolve to stop doing it." Audrey Hepburn “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m possible!” Robert Bloch “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” Timothy Leary "Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.” Joel Osteen "You cannot soar with the eagles as long as you hang out with the turkeys." George Carlin "Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?" Truman Capote "Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor." Sydney Harris "When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’" Albert Einstein "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." Yogi Berra "If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else." Doris Day "The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you’ll grow out of it."