Fox News Jokes

Late-Night Jokes About Fox News Channel

Fox News Cult
via Twitter

"Fox News has forbidden Sean Hannity from appearing in any more campaign ads for Donald Trump. Fox said, 'We want to appear neutral while covering the race between Mr. Trump and that Sickly Lying Witch.'" –Conan O'Brien
"President Obama gave a speech this afternoon in which he angrily called out Republicans for being too obsessed with his refusal to use the term 'radical Islam' — or as Fox News reported it, 'Angry Black Man Spotted Talking About Radical Islam Near Capitol Building.'" –James Corden
"Here's the detail I found most interesting: all the television sets must be tuned to Fox News. Wow! Because god forbid he walks into a hotel room, and the TV is on another channel, and he finds out what a sh---y job he's been doing. He's got avoid not just CNN and MSNBC, I think Animal Planet is doing stories on that now. ... There was one other detail on the bottom of the rider, it was handwritten and somewhat cryptic. He also requests a rifle, some ammo and an old man's face." --Jon Stewart, on Dick Cheney's hotel suite demands
"He sat down for a one-on-one with Fox News. Very bold choice. Dick Cheney sitting down with Fox News is like Mrs. Butterworth sitting down with the Pancake Channel." --Jimmy Kimmel
"Fox News' Bill O'Reilly has been at the forefront in defending Christmas, even though, until recently, Fox's own online store invited viewers to buy an 'O'Reilly Factor' holiday ornament for their holiday tree. In the war on Christmas, that's known as friendly fire. ... Legend has it every time you say 'Happy Holidays,' an angel gets AIDS." --Jon Stewart
"It seems the Pentagon has been paying Iraqi journalists to promote a proWhite House view in Iraqi newspapers. See, luckily, we don't have that kind of thing here. We have Fox News." --Jay Leno
"House Majority Leader Tom DeLay says he is innocent of all wrongdoing and is the victim of a plot by the Democrats. Fox News does too; they've been spinning this story so hard they had to give the staff Dramamine today." --Jimmy Kimmel
"By the way, if you want to help the victims hit hardest by hurricane Katrina, Fox News has posted the Web site of the Republican National Committee." --Bill Maher
"Oh FOX News, why must the irony-free zone be next to the No Spin Zone?" --Jon Stewart, on a Fox News Channel report about terrorists using the media
"A lot of Republicans have come forward to criticize Howard Dean about his latest comments about the Republican Party. Let me tell you something -- if Dean wants to insult you and make outrageous statements he should do what the Republicans do and get a talk show on Fox News." --Jay Leno
"A cable access show has a character called 'Dick Smart' and it was a talking penis, trying to tell kids about contraception. A court of appeals has laid down the law that you cannot have a talking penis on the TV. Fox News has reacted immediately and fired Sean Hannity." --Bill Maher
"Fox News broke the story with the stunning words 'We have a pope!' Exclamation point. ... Apparently Fox News is now officially a diocese." --Jon Stewart
"Executives at the Fox News Channel announced they're going start a Fox News financial channel. Yeah, the Fox News financial channel will be different because whenever the stock market goes down, they'll blame it on Hillary Clinton." --Conan O'Brien
"Fox News Channel has launched a contest called 'Bloviate with Bill,' in which six viewers will be flown to New York and given the chance to fend off O'Reilly's unwanted sexual advances." --Tina Fey
"A female producer at Fox News has filed a sexual harassment suit against Bill O-O-O'Reilly. She claims he repeatedly talked to her about phone sex, threesomes and masturbation. The last straw was when he asked her if her breasts were fair and balanced." --Jay Leno
"Dick Cheney finally answered questions about the hunting accident on Fox News. You know, I think Fox News is a little biased. They called it 'Interview with a Marksman.'" --Jay Leno
"Dick Cheney gave an interview to Fox News. Some are accusing Fox of giving softball questions. My answer to that is, 'Well, does a vice president shoot in the woods?'" --David Letterman
"A female producer at Fox News has filed a sexual harassment against Bill O'Reilly. He reportedly talked to her about phone sex, threesomes and masturbation. Of coarse, the people at Fox News were shocked. They had no idea O'Reilly was a Democrat. Oh, it gets worse, after she hung up on him, Bill tried to *69 her." --Jay Leno

"CBS News today has fired four employees for wildly fabricating a news story. The good news: they all got jobs over at Fox." --Craig Ferguson
"The election is in full-swing. Republicans have taken out round-the-clock ads promoting George Bush. Don't we already have that? It's called Fox News." —Craig Kilborn
"The race for the Democratic nomination is getting tight. In Iowa, it is a four-way dead heat — Dean, Kerry, Edwards and Gephardt. It is so close, Fox News doesn't know who to smear." —Bill Maher
"Democrats were reluctant to allow Al-Jazeera in their convention, because they thought their coverage would be biased and hostile. Then they realized it couldn't be any worse than Fox News." —Jay Leno
"This week in Baghdad, four people were arrested for pretending to be journalists. I'll tell you, this has got all the people over at Fox News nervous." —Jay Leno
"The Bush administration announced that it is starting its own news channel in Iraq so they can deliver the administration's point of view without any interference. Not surprisingly they are gonna call it the Fox News Network." —Conan O'Brien
"A couple of hours ago, President Bush arrived back in the United States after a controversial trip to England. The president said he was looking forward to seeing his loved ones. Of course he was talking about the reporters at Fox News." —Conan O'Brien
"The Chinese government launched China's first 24-hour news channel. And since the channel will only report stories that are favorable to the ruling party, they've decided to call it Fox News." —Conan O'Brie
"Rupert Murdoch, the owner of Fox News, has announced that he will support President Bush's re-election. Really, it's so hard to tell from the news coverage." —Jay Leno
"Roger Ailes, the head of the Fox News Channel, is denying reports that he sent President Bush a letter giving him advice on the war. In his own defense Ailes said I'm not in a position to give anyone advice, I hired Geraldo." —Conan O'Brien
"This week the Fox News Channel found out that a man that they had repeatedly interviewed lied about being a Lieutenant Colonel in the Army and he wasn't a real Colonel at all. Yeah, and they had been interviewing this guy for months. After hearing the news a spokesperson for FOX said, 'Big deal, Geraldo is not a real reporter.'" —Conan O'Brien