12 Crude But Funny South Park Quotes You Don't Want to Read

South Park Characters
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"South Park" is not for the faint-hearted. It could offend the sensibilities of those who can't handle in-your-face, raucous humor. "South Park" humor is racist, sexist, chauvinistic, and offensive. Despite the vulgarity, "South Park" scores high with fans.

What Makes "South Park" Such a Popular Series

In the words of some die-hard "South Park" fans, it is the only intelligent show that takes jabs at hypocrisy and the pretentious world we live in. Be it politics, social structures, or family values, the animated series has something to say about everything. When you look at the world through the eyes of social misfits like Eric Cartman, you see how our beliefs are based on a bunch of misplaced values.

"South Park" Characters

Take for instance "South Park"'s most loved (and most obnoxious) character, Eric Cartman. He resembles that kid at school whom everyone loves to hate. He is a narcissistic, foul-mouthed, devious kid who has little regard for society or people. Yet, Eric Cartman is known for his biting truth.

Stan and Kyle are best friends, though they often disagree. Stan is a knowledgeable friend, and he often ponders life issues. Kyle is a Jewish boy, who, though proud of his roots, often displays self-doubt. Eric Cartman's anti-Semitic views are targeted to make Kyle's life miserable. The whole TV series has profanity galore, with crude language, abusive words, and politically incorrect jokes that are projected as humor.

Despite its negative energy, "South Park" has managed to create waves in viewership. "South Park"'s debauched satire has won many awards, including five Primetime Emmy Awards and a Peabody Award. In 2013, TV Guide ranked "South Park" the 10th greatest TV cartoon of all time.

Crude But Funny South Park Quotes 

The humor is bizarre and often repugnant, but if you don't mind the politically incorrect language, you will have a wild time.

  • Season 1, Episode 4: Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride:
    • Sportscaster Frank: I haven't seen an Englishman take a blow like that since Hugh Grant!
  • Season 1, Episode 7: Pinkeye:
    • Eric Cartman: Kenny’s family is so poor that yesterday, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortgage.
  • Season 1, Episode 2: Weight Gain 4000:
    • Wendy: Dude, dolphins are intelligent and friendly!
    • Eric Cartman: Intelligent and friendly on rye bread, with some mayonnaise.
  • Season 5, Episode 11: The Entity:
    • Jewish Kid: Is anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate.
    • Eric Cartman: Maybe we should send you to a concentration camp.
  • Season 10, Episode 7: Tsst!:
    • Eric Cartman: I've lost almost 10 pounds now. You see what I mean? I totally know what it's like to be a Jew in the Holocaust now.
  • Season 4, Episode 6: Cherokee Hair Tampons:
    • Eric Cartman: Hippies. They're everywhere. They wanna save Earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad.
  • "Bigger, Longer & Uncut":
    • Satan: Without evil there could be no good, so it must be good to be evil sometimes.
  • Season 17, Episode 10: The Hobbit:
    • Stan: There have been malicious rumors started at this elementary school that my beautiful fiancée is a Hobbit. That is not funny and it is not true. Yes, she is heavier than most of her pictures show her to be. Yes, she gets her hair lasered off her body and yes, she has a friend named Gandalf, who happens to be a wizard.
  • Season 16, Episode 12: A Nightmare on FaceTime:
    • Eric Cartman: It's Stan's stupid Captain America costume, that's what throwing everybody off! How's people supposed to get that I'm the Hulk when Captain America is on freaking FaceTime?
  • Season 1, Episode 4: Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride:
    • Chef: You know what they say: You can't teach a gay dog straight tricks.
  • Season 16, Episode 11: Going Native:
    • Butters: You're all fake and stuck up, and none of you have the courage to tell Jimmy his jokes aren't funny! The only kid here with a sense of dignity is Kenny, and the rest of you have heads up your butts!
  • Season 4, Episode 3: Timmy 2000:
    • MTV Announcer: You're watching MTV, the cool, brainwashing, 12-year-old-and-younger station that hides behind a slick image. We're so cool that we decide what's cool. And now "MTV News." The news that is single-handedly dumbing-down our country, which is cool.